What If? Critter Character - Cellar Snacks


Noab, Kiyoshi, Riye

Date: May 9, 2014


A shaky coalition of household pets works to obtain extra food.

"What If? Critter Character - Cellar Snacks"

Suihou Residence

Miss Aigyou Suihou stumbles around her house, trying to dig her keys out of her purse with one hand while simultaneously grabbing various items from where they lie on counters and shelves and stuffing them into the purse with her other hand. "'Kay, mommy's got a big day ahead of her, so she won't be back until late! I fed you guys extra last night, so you should be able to hang on until I'm back! You guys be good now, play nice! Love ya, bye!" Suihou finally finds her keys and heads out the door, locking it behind her.
So who was she talking to, anyway? Why, her various and sundry pets, of course. Oh look, here comes one now, a fat little guinea pig rolling along the floor in a plastic ball. n.n What an adorably ponderous lump of — "'Teeeeeeen-SHUN!!!" >.< The plastic ball reverberates with the rodent's thundering shout. O.O; "All troops, front aaaaaaan' CENTER!!!"

Ever since being rescued by the mistress from the clutches of a moraless, dastardly, and quite frankly deranged hair care maker, the blue-ish green Shiba Inu has been the woman's ever faithful companion; doggedly following her around the house, and when possible, sneaking to work with her whenever he could. Today was to be no different, though he played things smarter this time by watching from afar. Despite his 'careful' planning the mistress was one step ahead of him this time. Thus, he'd end up careening into the door after a mad dash to try and follow her out.
This wasn't the first time this has happened… or even the third for that matter. Which may or may not explain why she didn't fall for the whimpering that followed the crash. "Mmn?… *groans* General's up to no good again." Kiyoshi murmured as he made his way before Noab and plop down on his hind-quarters to patiently.

Peeking down from the top of the fridge, this simple house cat glares down at the Guinea Pig. There's no special classification other than house cat for this brown and orange cat. Known simply as Sasha, the once sleeping cat sighs, "What is it now, rat under glass?" She hmms and hangs her front paws off the fridge, peering down and staring, "You sure do seem to be up in arms about something. Enough so to wake me from an otherwise pleasant dream in which you weren't inside that ball and I was well fed."

Noab rolls his ball back and forth as though pacing in front of a line of soldiers. "Intelligence reports indicate that now is an ideal moment for special operations! A window of time and a door of opportunity have been aligned!" Noab halts momentarily. "The window is obvious. The human is expected to return at twenty-hundred hours, giving us an exceptionally long period for action — a period which, however, we should not waste a moment of! As for the door…" Noab scrabbles to get his ball rolling down the hall. "…it's this door! The cellar door isn't shut properly, the latch didn't close! And in case you slept through basic training, the cellar is where all the food is kept!" >D Noab rolls back a bit from the door. "Now, we need engineering to handle this door! Watch it, the slightest bump could shut the latch! Private Poofy-Paws, you're up! If you want that dream of yours to come true, get that door open!"

Kiyoshi glares at Sasha from the corner of his eyes. Why was it that he put up with the cat in the first place? Oh right, because she was here first. The doggy equivalent of a sigh escapes the jowls of the green-ish haired Inu. Kiyoshi ends up missing a good chunk of the first part of the general's explanation, but he snaps to attention pretty quickly thanks to all the exclamations. Where the general goes, the dog follows with some reluctance. The same went for listening.
"… General-sama, we've been over this… my name is Kiyoshi." Kiyoshi deadpans. Afterwards, he'd glance up between the door, the general, the door again, Sasha, then the door one final time before winding up back at the general. "Mmn… I got nothing. Sasha-chan?"

Hopping down on to the counter from the fridge, the cat walks up to the edge of the counter to look down at the pair, "You lot would be helpless without me." She nods her head, "And just because you believe yourself to be called what you think your name is doesn't mean you get it." A paw goes up to her chest, "Take me for instance, I'm Riye and yet the lady calls me Sasha." A nod and she hops across to another counter and peers at the door, "Hmm…" She ponders as she peers at the door and ponders as she hops over to it, causing it to push down and the door creeks a little as it pulls slightly open.

Noab rocks his ball back and forth impatiently. "Your name is Curly-Tush as far as I'm concerned! Besides, I was talking to the cat. Insubordination aside, she's the one with the paws for this sort of delicate procedure." :P The door creaks open, and Noab nods judiciously. "Good work! All right, Pointy-Snout, you're on scouting detail. Find out the lay of the land and sniff out the treats!"

Kiyoshi fought down a growl, and instead lets out a groan as he shakes his head in exasperation. If it weren't for the fact that both of them liked to team up against him, Kiyoshi would've sided with the downfall of the other by now. Maybe. The loyalty to the mistress had to be taken into account above all other things for one.
"Hai, General-sama." Kiyoshi says with a tone bordering on insubordination. Then moved on down to the cellar, noise to air while on the steps, then to the grindstone as it were. "Ah.. ah.. gnff! Ugh.. dust…" He rubs his nose and moves on in search of the num nums. Sasha's first of course should the scent trail split at some point. "I tink I got something general-sama!"

Walking up to the ball that Noab is in, Sasha bats a paw at the ball lightly before saying, "You are lucky you are protected by that sphere, General Ratface." She then slips down after the dog and peers at the area before her, "What exactly do you have, dog?"

The layout of the cellar turns out not very complicated, of course. It's a bit dark, but the light coming down from the door is enough for their animal senses. The bags of food aren't hard to find, they're sitting against the wall in a convenient spot for the owner to fill bowls from them every day. There are also some treat bags on shelves nearby. Noab rolls in after the others. "Good work, troop, the objective is in sight! Keep your guard up, though, this would be the perfect place for an ambush or a tra — ACK*BONK*OOF*BONK*ERK*BONK*OW!" Noab spins to a stop on the cellar floor after coming upon the stairs a little sooner than he expected. "Uuuungh…see what I mean?" >.<;

"Litterbutt." Kiyoshi mutters derisively underbreath after the dog comment. He's just about to explain what he picked up, but then the general makes a racket going down the stairs. Every bounce is agony to the dog's sensitive ears! Kiyoshi ends up burying his ears beneath his paws before long. "Mmrph… Follow me." He states grumpily before making his way towards the treats section first, mindful all the while of the possibility that the general might just be right about ambushes. The cat couldn't be trusted to take care of any wild rodents for one. And secondly, the mistress might just have prepared for such a venture on their part. She's managed to outwit him a good number of times so far after all when all he wanted was to go wherever she went. >:|

Watching the 'General' fall down the steps with rapt attention, Sasha peers hopefully at the ball but when it remains intact, she sighs and then shakes her head, "Now…exactly how do you plan to get back up to the top of those steps?" She hmms and peers at the guinea pig before looking up at the area the dog is pointing out and then ponders, "And how exactly do you intend to eat anything while in that ball?" She shakes her head, "Your plan has a lot of holes in it."

Noab snorts. "The human can be depended on for extraction. As for getting food into the ball…well, maybe I planned this operation just to benefit the troops, ever think of that?" 3P Yeah, that was a detail that got stuffed far into the back of Noab's head. X) Anyway, Kiyoshi's concern about wild rodents is a smart one. As he approaches the wall, suddenly a rat pokes his head out of the dog food bag! "'Ey, what gives? Yous chumps is supposed ta stay up in dat part of da house!" >P The rat pulls himself out of the bag and stands defensively on top of it. "Da cella belongs ta da Prince of Rat-T'ieves, Gonff! Now beat it, yous don't belong in da dark!"

"I'll carry him." Kiyoshi barks curtly without caring to explain how. Maybe he had been practicing some weird doggy tricky to get more love from the mistress. Regardless of what the case may be, the dog zeroes back in on the main objective. "I knew it.." He growls out guttural at the first hint of rats. "Your the ones that don't belong in the mistress home. So scram, or I'll let litterbutt have at you."

"You won't let me do anything. I take it back, General. This was a fantastic idea." Sasha steps forward with tail flicking this way and that, "I know what I"m having for my snack." A large cheshire grin appears on the cat's face as she walks up toward the bag, "Don't worry about the cellar, rat. I got a new place for you." Her tongue flicks over her mouth.

Gonff smirks nastily. "You t'ink I call myself a Prince fer nuttin'? 'EY GUYS, COME ON OUT!!!" Suddenly every roach, spider, beetle, and other creepy-crawly denizen of the cellar comes swarming out of hiding. "Let's show 'em who's boss down 'ea in da dark!" >D "AMBUSH! Offensive countermeasures!" Noab barks. >.< Of course, Noab doesn't have much to worry about, safe in his plastic ball. He charges across the cement floor, rolling over the skittering bugs. Riye and Kiyoshi, on the other hand, could end up with quite a few clinging, biting passengers pretty quick if they don't watch out — and Gonff makes an attempt to be one of them, springing at Kiyoshi while (he hopes) the dog is distracted! >D

Kiyoshi's ears curl back and tail stops wagging in anticipation of a short scuffle as Gonff's army comes out to play. "Wha-what?!" Is all the dog manages before bugs land on his back and nips his butt. With a sharp yelp, Kiyoshi starts running around, crushing bugs unfortunate enough to get caught in his path. He even goes as far as practicing the mistress rollover maneuver, but MAN are they clingy!
Needless to say, Kiyoshi is by far too distracted to defend himself at the moment. Rather or the rat prince is up for a wild ride on the other hand might just put things back in his favor. Maybe. He does ram into random things in the dark to boot, so…

A blink and then a hiss follows as the cat does not at all find this appropriate. She screeches out as something bites onto her and then she shakes her head, "You two are on your own." And he jumps up toward the stairs and starts to go into full retreat.

There's quite a bit of chaos in the cellar, certainly! Gonff clings to Kiyoshi's fur as he flops around, occasionally getting smushed under the dog's weight. x.x All that rolling doesn't do much to deter the bugs, though, they're small enough that Kiyoshi's fur cushions them from being crushed. "EXTRACTIVE ACTION!!!" Noab roars, charging at Kiyoshi. His ball crashes against Gonff, knocking him off the dog. "Gah! Yous senile fluffball, c'mere!" Gonff latches onto Noab's ball, preventing it from moving. "Aha, I seen one'a dese before…lessee now, just need ta find da right spot ta twist…" Noab barks at Kiyoshi while Gonff scrabbles with the lid of the ball. "Up the stairs, now! Find the light switch!" >.<

The added weight does little to deter Kiyoshi. Its the bugs he's more concerned with. When running about yelping about (and probably disturbing the neighbors as well) doesn't help, Kiyoshi grinds to a stop, plops down on his bottom, and delivers the very same justice he dispenses to ticks on their sorry carapaces! A growl goes out to the general for interrupting his attempt at getting rid of the remaining clingers. Still, he follows the order to the best of his ability as instinctively as he would the mistress' commands. If he spots the cat closer the light he'd bark at her to help. Knowing Sasha as he did, the odds weren't likely of THAT happening.

Rushing away, it seems Sasha had abandoned them. All was lost! All is without hope! All is…bright? A shadow whips off from the stairs and then a click is heard as a cat can be seen hanging from the chain that controls the light of this room and brightens it right up as the cat hangs there, swinging a little before letting go and falling to the floor to land perfectly on her feet.

Oh sure, NOW the cat is the big hero. :P The creepy-crawlies scatter instinctively as the cellar is flooded with light, vanishing into the nooks and crannies. Gonff had just managed to unscrew the lid of Noab's ball when everything became bright. "GAH! 'Ey, dat's cheatin'! Gyah, I'll getcha fer dis!" >.<; Gonff flees back into whatever hole allowed him to get into the house.
Noab climbs out of his ball. "Haha, well done, troop. To the victors go the spoils!" >D The rest of the day is spent enjoying easy access to the pet treats, along with all the other interesting toys the cellar has to offer. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

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