Visit to the Funny Farm


Sousa, Kazeodori, Haruko (briefly), Kuoroke

Date: August 4, 2012


The Kazekage and a few other ninja make a visit to an insane asylum, just in time to participate in a little game.

"Visit to the Funny Farm"

Guratsuku Asylum [Land of Wind]

B-rank: The Kazekage is planning a trip to Guratsuku Asylum to inspect the facility and study some of its inmates. He requires ninja of varying ranks to assist with note-taking, travel logistics, and of course bodyguard duty. The mission is listed as B-rank because of the importance of keeping the Kazekage safe, but there is no especial reason to expect trouble. It's just a visit to the funny farm, what could go wrong? ;)

o/~ …to the Happy Home, with trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket-weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes… o/~ 8D
That's where Sousa is headed today with a small entourage of assistants. Guratsuku Asylum, home to some of the Land of Wind's more…abnormal individuals. The mere existence of such an establishment in this day and age is considered quite progressive…read 'foolhardy' by some. In most societies, people with mental problems are weeded out of the population by simple natural selection — kinda sad, but that's life, think most. What kind of idiots go to the trouble of not only protecting and providing for such burdens, but gathering all the nutjobs into one place? But Sousa seems to see value in even these deranged people…perhaps even especially in them. Normal people are easy to find, after all. c.c
Arriving at the asylum, the group is greeted by the warden. "Welcome, Kazekage-sama. I'm pleased you've taken the time to come inspect our facility. I hope you'll find that the inmates are being cared for to your satisfaction." "Oh, I'm certain you've been diligent in that respect," Sousa replies, breezing into the building. "I'm more interested in what you've learned from them. The observation deck is this way, correct?" The warden blinks and hurries to keep up. "Er, yes, the more docile of our patients will be out in the garden at this time. They exhibit some fascinating behaviors at times, although much of the time they also simply sit about and…well, we hope that they're thinking, but it's hard to tell…"
The observation deck provides a view of the common garden area in the center of the building, the wall facing toward it consisting entirely of thick glass panels. Sousa watches the patients going about their leisure time from above. "Quite an assortment down there," Sousa remarks to the ninja with him. "Do you see any particularly interesting ones?"

Kazeodori scurries to keep up with Kazekage Sousa, who moves with such swift grace that even the warden only attempts to keep pace. Why, one might ask, would a boy so young be so interested in the lunacies of those deemed insane? The answer, so simply put, would be - per the subconscious inquiries of the unknown niches of the soul - to establish whether one were, themselves, considered insane. Thus, Kazeodori, being so often referred to as 'unique' and 'crazy, man' finds himself tagging along, beneath the pretense of helping however the Kazekage may need, the falsity of which belying the youth's desire to see actual crazy people, and either act more like them or less like them, depending on who he's talking to and whether or not he actually like that person.
"Oh, look at him! He's walking on his hands like legs!" is, for example, an exclamation of Kazeodori's which he finds amusing, for walking on your hands through the village might cause quite a hilarious commotion. Then again, it may also be the reason the man is in here in the first place.

Amaro Haruko is eerily quiet. Unlike the Kazekage, she does not think it's a good idea to let the crazies live. She thinks it's a particularly ill-informed idea to place them together where they can stew and plot in their madness, who knows what dangerous thoughts could come forth from a gathering of madman.

Her scarf is accompanied by a second one, which covers her face except for two small slits for her eyes, and by means of exception she's wearing her chuunin jacket. No word is said as she walks, but the two kunai in each hand speak for themselves, a Chuunin-level or higher ninja does not openly display weaponry AND the fact she's a ninja of her level if it serves no purpose.

Today, she is hoping it will prevent violence from occurring in the first place.

Kuoroke is here for two purposes: firstly, he is here as an assistant and escort to his boss, should a reasonably competent and trustworthy individual be requires, and secondly, he is here to see, for himself, why this place isn't being leveled, inhabitants and all. The latter has a bit of a caveat, in that, should he decide this place is not worth keeping open, he will have the chance of forming an idea of the most efficient way to dispose of the inhabitants and, optimally, repurpose the building. "Interesting?" Kuoroke remarks, grumpily, "Not really. Everyone seems to be quiet and peaceful. -That- one can draw pretty well, though."

Sousa nods absently. "Intriguing how a damaged brain can still excel at certain tasks. Sometimes beyond what a normal one can." The warden blinks and peers down at the patients that have been pointed out. "Wait a minute, that's — 'Murder Scene' Penki! Good heavens, and 'Contrary' Souhan, and — I can see half the dangerous patients in the asylum in that crowd! They shouldn't be out of their rooms!"
The warden dashes over to an intercom. "Guard post C, this is Warden Kanrisha! Explain to me why unauthorized patients have been let into the garden!" The voice that replies is rather boyish. "Oh hello, Warden. I'm afraid the guards here aren't up to answering. They were playing a rather intense game with some of the other inmates earlier, and it's left them, shall we say, spent." The Warden's face pales. "Darei? Is that you?" "So pleased you recognize my voice, Warden. Three points for you. If you like, you can cash them in for a clue about today's game." "Darei, this isn't a GAME, it's — " "EVERYTHING is a game, Warden." "Nngh, fine, tell me!" "That's more like it. The game is called 'Escape'. One of the others came up with it, but it sounded like fun, so I decided to play along, and so did a lot of the others. Obviously, anybody who makes it out of the building wins. I don't imagine the others will like me giving you hints, but what's a game without any challenge? So here's your clue: what kind of key opens every door?" There is a click, and the intercom falls silent.
Sousa tilts his head. "Well, Kanrisha-san? Do you know what he's referring to?" The warden turns around. "I think so, yes. There's an emergency release system, designed to let all the patients out in the event of a major emergency, like an out-of-control fire. It requires a key to be used at one of four security centers around the building." There is a smashing of glass down below. "Well, it would appear that the 'game' has begun in earnest, so we had best go and reinforce those security centers," Sousa remarks. "One of us for each."
After being given hasty directions to the security centers, the ninja are off on their separate tasks, through hallways now prowled by the criminally insane!

Kazeodori looks towards his compatriots as the conversation between the warden and Darei unfolds, the Genin's face falling with each revelation as to the scene unraveling. It is not until Sousa's words, until Sousa's nonchalance as to the accomplishment of those ninja currently with him, that Kazeodori finds his courage, and in this resolve so acts. The boy nods, and immediately leaps onto the closest wall, the firm glow of chakra alighting his feet as he sprints horizontally to one of the necessary corners. The boy is, in fact, unsure of what the security centers look like, let alone how he'll stop those who are so trying to escape from the asylum. Kazeodori can't help but wonder, on his rush to the corner, how it is that such a situation came to pass, and why - oh why - would an insane asylum for dangerous criminals have four separate unlocks for the doors. It just… doesn't make sense. Kazeodori's face thus tightens, his speed slowing, the consideration of the cool of the warden and the ease of the takeover like a bright light overcoming his attention.

"I always said they weren't worth the resources sunk into this place." the Councillor mutters, quietly, when trouble breaks out. Immediately, he gets to doing his job here. First of all, Kuoroke takes off his glasses, putting them in the pocket of his cloak. From the same pocket, he produces a pair of goggles, considerably better suited for battle, and puts them on while loosening his neck and arms. Once prepared, the Kuroki starts walking, at first, then breaks into a run. On the way, the tattoos on his feet slide onto the bottom of his shoes, allowing him to skate through the corridors, shoving anyone who's in the way out of it. Anyone who resists shoving is either maneuvered around, or simply thrown out of the way.

When Kazeodori arrives, by luck or judgment, at his targeted security center, he finds the artist Kuoroke took note of before, compulsively sketching the hallway outside. "Yes…perfect angularity, stark lighting…such a raw expression of sterility…but the murder scene won't be complete until it has a — " Penki looks up as Kazeodori arrives and seems visibly relieved. "Ahhh, good. I do so hate it when the murder scene is missing its body." Penki flips to a fresh page of his sketchbook and quickly draws a trio of shuriken. The paper within the outlines rips free and hardens, then flies toward Kazeodori in a flurry!
Haruko manages to arrive at her security center briefly before the inmate targeting it does. 'Contrary' Souhan comes loping along the ceiling from the other side of the hallway, giving Haruko a grin which somehow manages to convey the exact opposite of cheerfulness. "Hey, you're here to keep me out, aren't you? Well too bad for you! Joushi-hime gave me very specific instructions on what not to do, and I'm doing it!" Souhan drops from the ceiling and lands in a running handstand, legs blurring in a series of kicks.
Kuoroke, despite the fact that he's probably faster than either Kazeodori or Haruko, almost arrives too late at his destination. The door of the security center is blasted wide open, and bodies lay strewn about. He's just in time to see the last few spasms of the sole remaining guard as he dangles by his throat from a clenching hand. Joushi-hime, as the other inmates call her, is a towering, powerfully-built woman, so much so that they apparently couldn't find a jumpsuit quite big enough for her. She drops the guard and looks over to Kuoroke. "Hn. You're going to be more of a challenge, aren't you."

Kazeodori finds himself, upon finishing his sprint to the security center, before a precise masterpiece of ink. It's only as he tunes himself to the ramblings of the man with the pen that he realizes Penki's intentions.
"Murder sce- oh!" exclaims the youth as the three shuriken take tangible and whirl towards the Genin. Kazeodori, in the flashes of instance as how his own mind works, is as equally quick in flickering from his location to a position closer to the ninja artist, the shuriken spiraling by into the depths of the hallway. Once the realization of his new location layers itself in completeness across the boy's eyes - and as he takes note of Penki's position - the youth leaps forward, a hand outstretched, a spark of electricity crackling around his fingers. The boy's suspicions, for now at least, are caught beneath the hammer of necessity.

"Put down the guard, and if he's still alive, I won't take any parts off you that I don't have to. And yes, I will be a challenge - which makes one of me in the room." Kuoroke promises, dropping his hands. While he's threatening, and thus stalling, his fingers attach a piece of paper to one of his kunai. When he's quite done talking to the woman, he opens by throwing said kunai, not so much to hit, as to put it in the wall somewhere near the controls. After the throw, he strongly inhales, forming a few handseals, and then inhales in one blast, breathing out a sphere of rapidly circulating air towards the female.

Penki yelps and holds up his sketchbook to block Kazeodori's strike. Strengthened by chakra, the pages are apparently able to withstand the electrified blows, at least for now. "Hey! This is supposed to be a 'Still Death' scene!" Penki scratches a swift series of lines, which peel off the page as needles and dart at Kazeodori's feet. He follows up with a kick, not that of taijutsu-specialist ninja, but better-trained than the average non-shinobi fighter.
Joushi catches the kunai-bomb and redirects it to a ceiling corner, then grabs a nearby office chair and swings it up to block the wind attack. "Don't underestimate me," she growls. "I'm not just another random nutcase they tossed in here, I'm a ninja who kept her clan alive during the wars." Joushi hurls the remains of the chair at Kuoroke, then starts doing some handseals of her own. "I'm not even crazy! You know why they put me in here? Because I killed some wet-nosed 'official' who refused to call me Joushi-hime!" Joushi spits several high-speed balls of flame in Kuoroke's direction. "Is that so crazy!? Demanding the respect I DESERVE as the leader of my people!?"
Since Haruko's indisposed OOC, we'll assume she's doing okay handling her uncooperative opponent. Oh, and Sousa? He hasn't encountered anybody of consequence. Guess the criminal patients are only targeting three of the security centers and Sousa picked the odd one out. Figures. e.e

As the needles penetrate the boy's feet, the Genin disappears in a puff of smoke, replaced by a small block of wood. Kazeodori emerges a moment later from behind a recess cut into the hallway for water fountains, the boy having snuck himself away when Penki threw up his sketchbook to block the electrified attack. The boy's hands are up, his steps slow as he approaches Penki.
"Sorry! Sorry, sir. You just attacked me. How was I supposed to know it was to be a still?"
Kazeodori drop his arms at his side, taking a firm glance at the artwork along the wall.
"Where is it you'd like me to stand?" inquires the youth, grasping his hands behind his back.
Such innocence is - as one would expect - a ruse. Behind his back, Kazeodori is slowing forming the hand seals needed for him to release his great torrent of breath. And once Penki begins explaining (or if he attacks the boy in the youth's apparent pacifism), such will the torrent be rushed towards the living artist.

"Firstly," Kuoroke answers, throwing off his robe, "I'm not a medical official, so it's not up to me. Secondly, you're also a murderer. Thirdly, lady, I'm an official, and I officially order you to stand down and surrender." As the flames come his way, he spreads his hands and activates his tattoos, the flames reaching his chest and then running along his skin like water on a duck's plumage, only slightly singing him. "But lastly, I. Don't. CARE." Roaring the last word, Kuoroke rips the smouldering remains of his vest off his body, Kuoroke gets physical, charging the female and throwing a punch at her. The second punch, seemingly towards her head, is aimed to miss, because it's not the fist that's intended to cause an effect: on a string held in his fingers, another tag trails, a flashbang tag, timed to fire just as it passes her face. For that moment of explosion, Kuoroke closes his eyes, before re-opening them and sending his knee towards the bottom of her ribs.

Penki looks quizzical as Kazeodori returns, pen held ready to scratch out another attack…but apparently his delusion is strong enough that he bites on any idea that aligns with it. "Oh! Finally, a compliant subject. I don't want you standing, though, the murder scene involves a body lying down. Here, let me position you for the — " As Penki looks down to his sketchbook and focuses in on drawing some intricately detailed murder weapon, Kazeodori's wind attack blasts over him and slams him into the opposite wall. He slumps to the ground, head reeling while bits of his drawing flutter down around him. "Oh, that explains it…I'm the subject of this scene." With that, he conks out. x.x
Joushi's eye twitches. "You…order…ME!?!?!" Yyyeah, despite seeming stable and capable for the most part, there's probably some validity to the assessment that Joushi's need for homage is on the level of neurotic. Getting physical with her seems not to be the best of strategies; as she's already demonstrated, she has good taijutsu capabilities, and her size isn't just for show. She catches Kuoroke's first punch in her hand and starts twisting it downward, blocking the other punch with her other arm. Good thing Kuoroke's strategy doesn't consist entirely of physicality. The flashbang catches the enraged ninja princess off guard, saving Kuoroke's wrist from a painful snapping and opening her up to the knee in her gut.
Then something odd happens. The knee strike probably shouldn't have hurt a strong combat veteran like her too much — indeed, Kuoroke probably felt quite a bit of resistance to the blow in her stomach muscles — but she backpedals in shock, doubles over, and slowly curls into a ball on the floor. "W…whadja do that for?" Joushi whines in a strained voice. "I'm a p-princess, you idiot! Ahhhhhhhhh!" DX Joushi cries like an infant with her knees pulled up to her chest. Apparently she's not very accustomed to actually feeling pain. c.c
After that, there isn't too much trouble. The remaining (mostly non-ninja) criminal patients are rounded up and locked back in their rooms…although there were one or two that went unaccounted for. Perhaps they didn't stick with the plan of releasing all the patients, and instead managed to slip out on their own during the trouble. At any rate, Sousa doesn't let the incident spoil his research. Indeed, if the breakout was going to occur, he regards it as lucky that it did when he was present. It was a unique opportunity to observe abnormal personalities in a combat situation…and, y'know, it was good that ninja were present to stop them. :P

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